You finally work up the courage to share something personal… a moment that shaped your life, a challenge you’ve overcome, a win that felt huge… and then?
Nothing.
No reply. No comments. The only person cheering you on is your mama or your bestie.
So you start questioning yourself: Did I overshare? Was it boring? Am I just not meant to do this?
I get it. I’ve been there (and so have many of my clients, before starting to work together of course).
The truth is, your story isn’t the problem. The problem is how you’re telling it.
If you’ve ever felt like your message isn’t landing or resonating with your audience, stay with me… because I’m about to break down exactly why that happens and how to fix it.
Here’s the hard truth: People aren’t reading your story because they care about you (at least, not at first). They’re reading because they want to see themselves in it.
If your story feels like a play-by-play of your experience without any connection to their struggles, they’ll scroll right past it.
The Fix: Before sharing a story, ask yourself:
~
What’s the “aha” moment I want my audience to have?
~What question could I ask to prompt this aha?
~What story from my life connects to this lesson?
Action Step: Struggling to come up with story ideas?
Create a Story Bank.
Every day, take 2-3 minutes to jot down small moments that happen to you—conversations, struggles, wins, funny mishaps, emotional realizations. Keep a “Story Bank” note tab on your phone so you always have personal experiences to pull from when you need to connect with your audience.
Instead of saying,
"I was scared to share my story, but I did it anyway," try asking:
"Have you ever written a vulnerable post and then hovered over the ‘post’ button, terrified? I have too. I remember the first time I shared my story and felt like I might pass out. But here’s what happened when I finally hit publish…"
If your story lacks emotion, it won’t land… because people connect with how you felt, not just what happened.
But many of us have been conditioned not to show emotion. We’ve been taught that sharing feelings is unprofessional, that we need to be polished, that we should “stick to the facts and don’t mix business and personal.”
I disagree. You can do this without sharing all of the skeletons in your closets (and yes it’s okay to not talk about #allthethings).
Emotion is what makes people trust you.
When you share your raw, impactful experience… when you talk about the fear, the excitement, the heartbreak, the uncertainty… you give your audience permission to feel those things too.
Instead of saying,
"I used to struggle with visibility," say:
"I remember sitting in a meeting, my throat tight, my hands sweating, knowing I had something big to say—but I just couldn’t make myself speak. I drove home in tears, wondering why I was holding myself back."
Action Step: Next time you share a story, ask yourself: How did this moment make me feel? Can I bring my audience into that feeling?
So many of us hold back because we think:
"Who am I to share my story?"
"What if people judge me?"
"Does anyone really care?"
But here’s what I need you to know: When you speak up and share your story you give others permission to share their story.
Think about a time someone else shared something vulnerable… a struggle, a win, a truth you didn’t know you needed to hear. Didn’t it make you feel seen? Less alone?
That’s exactly what happens when you share.
When you go first, you make it safer for others to do the same. You create space for the conversations that truly matter.
Instead of hesitating to share your story,
ask yourself:
"Who needs to hear this today?"
"What permission does my story give someone else?"
When you tell a story, keep it simple and focused:
1️Start with a Hook – Ask a relatable question or share an emotional moment.
2️Show the Shift – What changed? What realization did you have?
3️
Give a Takeaway – How does this apply to your audience? What action should they take?
Example in Action:
Hook:
"Have you ever felt invisible in a room full of people?"
Shift:
"I used to sit in meetings with my heart pounding, afraid to raise my hand. Then one day, I realized—if I didn’t speak up, I’d never be seen as a leader."
Takeaway:
"If you’ve been holding back, here’s your permission slip: your voice matters. And it’s time to own your story."
If you’re ready to stop second-guessing your message and start using storytelling as a powerful tool to connect, inspire, and sell—then I’d love to invite you to my It’s Time to Own Your Story: Mini-Course.
In this self-paced course, you’ll learn how to:
✔️ Identify the key moments in your story that captivate your audience.
✔️ Share your story in a way that builds trust and positions you as the go-to expert.
✔️ Use storytelling across your website, social media, and sales conversations to attract and convert more clients.
Plus, you’ll get a
step-by-step workbook and
personal feedback on your brand story—so you can start sharing with confidence.
As a mother, wife, connector, and dream builder, I’m Darlene Hawley, the founder of DarleneHawley.com and an Executive Leadership & Businesss Coach dedicated to empowering leaders like you.
My passion lies in helping ambitious professionals cultivate their unique leadership style while crafting an authentic and impactful personal brand. Through my coaching, we’ll work together to build a solid foundation that not only inspires your team but also drives results and growth within your organization.
Since 2007, I have been committed to guiding leaders and entrepreneurs in launching and scaling their businesses with confidence and clarity.
Today, I focus on supporting women in reaching their leadership goals and living their dream lives—all while balancing the joys of raising my family and creating meaningful memories each day.
Together, we’ll transform your challenges into opportunities, allowing you to lead with authenticity and inspire those around you.